Why move the old man a small woman like?

Have you ever thought why you young age is almost always in love with that great man your father do? Is that you really love him, or his presence to meet your desire for some kind of? Are you really worship him, or do you need a subconscious sense of security for compensation? Of psychology, you most desire is that you most need can be most needed in real life are often not eager to give you happiness, your lead hand, a greater loss and disappointment.　　Here, to explore a "small" woman in love with "big" man's reason may help you understand your deep desire: Perhaps because this is too hungry, you will be caught in error; or too lacking in this area, you was eager to find compensation in that regard.　　One reason: the loss of childhood father　　Your performance:　　1. You see him, that he did not father the child has been compensated.　　2. Once you in his hands, and the other lost spontaneously.　　Your experience: born in childhood death of his father, or parents divorced single-parent families.　　Psychological analysis:　　Since you have been in the subconscious desire for a father, when you find love partner, it is difficult to reject his original desire. Also, because you do not have experience with the Department and father, your father's desire most from your fantasy, so, in reality, the reality often away from your dreams and let you down.　　If you see him, that he did not father the child has been compensated, and that you find so much love, but rather that you find a heart defect partner. Although compensation and love often very similar, but essentially they are not the same: love is the production, compensation is consumption; love is positive, the compensation is negative; love is giving, a claim for compensation.　　Only love can become productive in the healthy personality: You give me love and I have because of your love and more love. Conversely, if you only need him as compensation for the heart, you fall hard not to blindly "enjoy" the deviation compensation, so forget or ignore the other party, because your character is not perfect, your heart is missing the power of love , this way, even if he loves you in the beginning, with the desire and time to meet his love for you will inevitably not lost; Similarly, your love for him may also be because of differences in age and character The fission. Result, the elders thought leaning against a big man like you can from this once and for all, everyone knows, once you put into his arms, and the other a sense of loss of pessimism, loss of compensation will bring you more disappointed.　　Action:　　1. Out of the shadows of childhood　　If you live in a long long time fantasy of fatherly love, out of the shadows of childhood imperative. Because only out of the shadows of childhood, you can face the future life; only get rid of troubles of fantasy, you can find their own preferences, psychologists tell us that one side will inevitably bring the other hand, repressed longing. Perhaps you and others need to peers as cheerful, energetic and enthusiastic, then forget it unpleasant childhood, once you get out of the haze of childhood, you will find outside is a sun.　　2. Do not refuse to woo the same age who　　In finding love on the road, do not prejudiced, not gratuitous autistic man should not think outside the exception of the peers will not have feelings. You know, very often we do not know themselves, and were only in the opposite sex who can truly know yourself, find yourself. So, do not easily reject suitors the same age, maybe you do not start feeling, once open the gate, with "his" actual contacts you will find unexpected fresh and fun.　　Second reason: too deep for her father　　Your performance:　　1. With him, you seem to return to the freewheeling childhood.　　2. As long as him, you can recklessly spoiled and willful.　　Your experience: childhood surrounded by a strong father.　　Psychological analysis:　　Sometimes, your father's feelings are too deep and will have you in the future on the big men of all ages and preferences. This is because the long childhood trip, you get used to his father's indulgence and coddled, but also used his father's coquetry and caprice, you indulge in tempting the arbitrary willfulness in, although your age has entered an adult, your thought was a minor child; maybe you can enter the social role at work, but emotionally it is hard to step out of the childhood of the world, once your heart germination of the seeds of love, you get used to the behavior you must lead a and your father is quite similar to the big man.　　Objectively speaking, a young girl and an older man may not be unhappy life, but only if you have to have love, and know the truth for truth, love to love to pay. If you pay the other side of love, and you are self-centered everywhere, or simply want him to obey your pulse, so unequal that love may find it difficult to maintain, and even your relationship will be conflict or fission.　　Action:　　1. Out of his father's influence　　Typically, the father is the maternal restrictions and additions. Because maternal love is unconditional, fatherly love is conditional. Unconditional love to give them love, warmth, conditional love to teach children to love the sense of proportion. If your father failed to give you love, not only measured, but also indulge more than you, then your eldest child, he is likely to confuse the value you love, you grow up deprived of the ability. As half of a relationship, if you do not mind giving love is only obtained in the interaction between the sexes, you will be difficult to be happy.　　2. Learning about the person　　Conscious learning about the person and can help you get out of narrow self-centered.

Three reasons: After the break, and young boys, seeking the protection of big men　　Your performance:　　1. You think that only older men love to give you security.　　2. You know that he treated you impeccable, but you still something missing.　　Your experience: a young boy had been deeply hurt, they might be between jobs, or irresponsibly walking away, excuses are "I was immature, just on impulse."　　Psychological analysis:　　For revenge, or retreat, you'll never dare with those between the young and irresponsible boy, you say, they are not mature, you believe that only a real man can give you a mature sense of security, so you choose a almost to be your father's big men.　　But after experiencing the pain of lost love, a persistent emotional development of girls seem very easy to change drastically different; once you find a person you love, now you think to find a man who loves you more affordable, more cost-effective. This way you inevitably do not fall into the trap of the interests of the place of love, What is done can not be undone once you will find that, despite his impeccable to be you, but you still something missing.　　Action:　　1. Do not look to rely on with scars　　After a period of injury, it is best not to rush into romance. People need to recuperate after injury, were injured in the psychological need more training and regulation. With injuries to rely on is not looking for can not be found, but, scars of pain to make you prone to selection error, the potential resentment and make you easy to confuse love the sense of proportion.　　Despite the injuries the pain of grievances and imbalances can often requires a healing alternative for the time being, however, alternative, after all, not love. Until wounds healed, the call will also love to tell you the real love, instead of until after the indulgence of all by surprise, as sensible from the outset to become your master. This will not only not to waste their own again, would not be unfair to others.　　2. What love is not a request is given　　Maybe you're the big man's obsession is that you do not want to give just want to obtain a copy, is really like, even though they are willing to give, you will not indulge in happy to be loved. Not sit back and enjoy the joy of love but rather the result of hard seeding. Once you learn the sowing love, perhaps the charm of big men also weakened. You have to believe that only through their own labor, in order to receive a copy of their own love.　　Four reasons: to think of girls dream of love　　Your performance:　　1. You never feel the same age boys, that they shallow and tasteless.　　2. Only big man to let you heart charming mature.　　Your experience: you naturally introverted, sensitive, and preoccupied. Since when do not know, you start to shape the novel and movie image of mature man out of the dumping, their eyes deep, mysterious smile, the complex has over all of your unspeakable appeal.　　Psychological analysis:　　The West have such statistics: a weak, easy to think of the boys fell in love with a mature large woman. Similarly, a sentimental young girl, over-age men are easy to be her big temptation.　　This is because, often sentimental to think of the product: not think there will be no worries, no thinking will not felt. The problem is, women tend to come from the romantic to her narcissistic, her narcissism and her romance deepened, and her fascination with the big man is this most romantic of the product.　　What is more, her pain was not in love itself, but rather she did not want to develop relationships, but just want to keep romance. Because, she likes to crush than love, she likes to crush the joys than exclusive confession. She is living in the building for their own dreams. If her lover is really good no harm, if he is not her imagination is so good, her wishful dreams will burst, also because of her own disillusionment and much harm.　　1. Out of the narcissistic　　Most girls have some narcissistic depression. She has the advantage of Duo Simin sense of the feeling of life was stronger than their peers, the disadvantage is the heart vulnerable, afraid of reality, and her romance with varying degrees of self-torture, if she was fortunate enough to get a big man who loved her, she would learn to live, out of the narcissistic; if she unfortunately met a cynical player, because she wanted to take a deeper self-inflicted injury and self-torture.　　If you are such a girl, preferably a conscious part in some group activities to make their own loneliness in communication with others to resolve, or you may wish to join an interesting work or career, so in a wider of life to overcome depression and feelings of others.　　2. The real romance is not out of　　Romance itself is not a bad thing, if a person in real life, in addition to maintain the appropriate romantic, her life is not easy to rust, but also easy to maintain vigor and optimism. If she blindly tempting depart from reality in romantic, her life is not easy to start, she will be prepared for life in the narrow sense of the loneliness and hurt.　　However, no man is an island, you can completely autistic, perhaps in a dream you and he can not be happy, but there is always a dream waking moment, people always grow up one day, rather than wait until then regret the past, as face of the present and cherish their own. Perhaps you think the more mature love big men are not often wrong, as long as you know who he is, what they want, how to do it, you will be able to control their own lives and pulse.